Wednesday, 16 March 2011

evil doctor people

hello again. have you missed me. you may have noticed I haven't posted for a while and i apologise but i havnt had one useful thought at all since my last one about. but now i've had a decently humorous one ive opened the flood gates of random, interesting and damn right stupid thoughts. my most recent is this.
the man who names illnesses is an evil, cruel sick man as it seems that behind a few medical conditions there is a sick humour here's a few:
hippomostrossusquivicaphobia: (and im not joking here) its the fear of long words
lisp: i know this seems ok at first glance but have you ever tried saying lisp with a lisp. it sounds like lithw
dislexia: even i had to check how to spell it how the hell is someone who actually has it meant to
i can only conclude from this that doctors are EVIL people.

Thursday, 10 March 2011

interesting head wear

my plan to post once a month has failed. I said that so I didn't become a serial blogger posting for the sake of posting but it turns out that when I'm bored my brain comes up with some pretty noteworthy stuff. so i thought id post for all the world to see my most resent brain wave.
the top 5 most tempting things to wear on your head:
5:cardboard box
4:assassin lemon's art project (long story)
3:jack o lantern
2:lamp shade
1: tea cosy

in regards to my last post i want to make it clear that my remarks about the french were no meant to be in any way offencive. i know a few french people and they are nothing like the stereotype i portraied or any other for that matter. but enough of what my lawyer told me to say.thanks for reading and keep checking for more brain garble.

Tuesday, 8 March 2011

ive got nowt else better to do

greetings. i am writeing to you now because i have ,as the title suggests, nowt else better to do so i have desided to tell you about the french. the french are an interesting people how have chosen that all the common domestic animals are not enough for them to eat and they have added frogs and snails to the menu. i mean really, given the option i wouldnt even want to hold a frog or a snail in my hand never mind put it in my freakin mouth!!!!!!! not only that but there language. being english i am used to living creatures having genders and inaniumate objects not having genders, but in french ooohhhhhhh no. this computer i am typing on for instance is male and the keyboard i am useing is probable female(i think). jut the last straw was the words they left out. the french dont have a word for FLUFFY. we dont realize how much we depend on this word but you just try descibing a poodle to a french man and you will see what i mean. they also use one word for tortise, terapin and turtle. for god's sake WWWWHHHYYYYY!?!?!?!?!??! and then as if it wasnt bad enough they dont acnolage the existance of custard!!!!!! so i am planning a trip to france and i shall take with me a fish tank full of custard with a fluffy terrapin swimming in it and run through the streets screeming at the top of my voice
 "EXPLAIN THIS TO ME!!!!!!!"
and see how they respond.


thanks for reading and keep checking for more posts. also check out "look at it this way" by assasin lemon. he's a friend of mine and o very funny guy.

Monday, 7 March 2011

my very first blog

hello people of the internet. you probably found this blog because it was suggested by a friend or because of all the heavy publicity and 5star reviews but if not then congratulations you have just blindly stumbled across my blog. just a warning in advance im not going to blog for the sake of blogging, im a busy man, but ill try for at least once a month but it will (hopefully) contain interesting, witty stuff rather than what i had for breakfast and what the weather is like. so watch this space and enjoy my future posts.